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Tips for Toilet Training

By: Dr. Noel Swanson.

Toilet training often provokes great anxiety in parents. Many seem to see it as some sort of competition - the earlier they get their child potty trained the brighter their child must be, and the better they as parents must be. Total nonsense of course! Trying to potty train your child before he or she is ready is a recipe for frustration, frayed nerves, and traumatized children.

There is a time for everything in nature. The less you tamper with it the better it is for you and your child. Your child will be ready for it one day and then the whole process will be more natural, much easier, and less stressful. Don’t compare your child with the neighbor’s child. It proves nothing.

Every child is different. Very few toddlers are genuinely toilet trained before the age of 20 months. Most start at around the age of two or three (boys later than girls), and some are even later than that. Almost all children are toilet trained by the age of 4, although 10% are still bedwetting at the age of 5. There is no rush. Trying to force the issue before they are ready can set up problems, such as soiling, that can continue for many years into the future.

Here are some tips to prepare your child for the toilet training and how to know when he or she is ready to start.

1. Make sure that she is familiar with her body, it's functions, and the names you as a family will use. It doesn't matter what names you use - wee, pee, tinkle, number 1 - as long as everyone knows what they mean. The same applies to body parts.

2. It is a good idea to let the child see you or other family member, of the same sex, using the toilet. Again, it’s a misconception that it will traumatize the kid. No, it won’t - unless you make a big thing of it. If you are natural your child will consider it natural as well. Talk about it in a mature manner so that it becomes a target to achieve when they are grown up. Toddlers are imitating grown-ups all the time. And, this will instill a sense of anticipation and desire to be like them. You may allow your child to flush the toilet; it helps to get them used to the whole process.

3. As the time approaches for starting the toilet training, get the potty out and leave it in a visible place. Make sure she knows what it is, and what it is for but, again, talk in terms of "one day you will be able to use this".

How to know when the child is ready? Look for these signs:

1. In order to help your child tell you when he is wet or dirty, you can point at the potty immediately after he urinated or had a bowel movement. And, in order to reinforce the idea of cleanliness and dryness, make sure you change the diaper as soon as possible, regardless of whether you spot it, or he tells you. Also, praise your child profusely when he comes and tells you that he needs a diaper change.

2. The second phase is when he has to decipher the signals. This can take a long time. Be patient. Often they get to know at the last moment, and then there is not sufficient time to rush to the toilet and pull off the diaper. By the time the clothes and diaper is removed the deed may have been done. Be prepared for many such accidents. If it happens too often, it is better to wait some more.

3. Your child will take some time to follow directions and instructions. He will have to be taught how to take a piece of tissue and throw it into the toilet. Do that first.

4. Look out for signs of developing bowel and bladder control, such as clear patterns of bowel movements. If your child’s stools are firm and well formed, and he is able to stay dry for several hours at a time, he is ready for toilet training because he will be able to control himself long enough to get to the bathroom. However, don’t let the child strain to withhold; that can cause more serious problems. If your child experiences pain on passing a motion, you may have to change the diet to make the stool softer and easier to pass.

5. As part of the preparation for toilet training, remove all negative notions about potty from your child’s mind. Some children have fears about flushing water or falling into the potty. You need to address these first. Your child should be looking forward to the day he can use a toilet like a grown up.

Once all these signs start to come together, she is probably ready to get started. When you do, remember to keep it all positive! Rewards for success, "oh, well", not punishments, for failures.

Best of luck.

Article Source: http://www.diet-article.com

Dr. Noel Swanson offers free expert parenting tips & advice on his website - just sign up for his newsletter and get a free chapter of his book, The GOOD CHILD Guide. You can also meet with other parents on a parenting forum.
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